Many ex-Christians continue to worry about their eternal fate if they, indeed, end up being “wrong.”

What if Jesus really was the son of God? What if the Christian God really is the one true God? What if there really will be a judgment day?

Ex-Christians legitimately worry about these things and many go to counseling for them.

My personal defense (and you can borrow this) is I spent years trying to make all the pieces fit in my head.

I wanted it all to be true so badly. I didn’t need 100% certainty. But I wanted it to be a reasonable faith.

… Something that didn’t conflict intellectually.

In the end, there was just too much evidence that it’s not true for me to put my faith in it.

Jesus promised that if you seek, you’ll find. He also said it’s so simple, a child can understand it.

Well, if I searched for years wanting to believe it was all true and still came to the conclusion that it’s not, that doesn’t say a whole hell of a lot about the case for Christianity.

My defense is I tried like hell, and I’m done. It shouldn’t be this hard. And if it turns out that I’m wrong, then it would have to be a pretty cruel God to send me to hell for an eternity for it.